Stuck Under a Shalsheles (19:16)

Since Torah scrolls contain no vowels or musical notes, Torah ‘readers’ first review using printed texts with Teamim (graphic signs representing musical notes). Besides providing the melody, the Teamim often reveal hidden meanings. Indeed, biblical commentator Abraham Ibn Ezra (1093-1167) writes that Biblical interpretations should always correlate with the Teamim.
Though the original chant dates from Sinai, the signs were fixed much later by Aaron ben Asher (900-960 in Tiberias). The 28 Teamim are divided into two main categories: Mechabrim-conjunctives and Mafsikim-pausals. Among the latter is the rare note, shalsheles, which appears only four times in the entire Torah. It looks like a streak of lightning, ‘zigzagging’ back and forth, as if unable to move to the next note. Rabbi Joseph Ibn Caspi (16th century) says it reflects inner conflict. 
One example occurs in this week’s reading. Two angels urge Lot and his family to leave Sodom immediately before it is destroyed. “Hurry…or you will be swept away.” When he hesitated, the men grasped his hand…and led them safely out of the city.”
Over “he hesitated” is a shalsheles, for Lot is torn between two alternatives, both of which exercise a powerful sway on him. After separating from Abraham, Lot chose Sodom despite the fact that its inhabitants, “Were wicked and were sinning greatly against the L-rd.”
When we next encounter Lot, he and his family have become profoundly assimilated. His daughters have married local men and, “He had just been appointed as a judge.” Lot’s sense of belonging, however, is about to come crashing down. When he tries to protect his guests, the townsmen warn him to, “Get out of our way,” Then they add, “This fellow came here as an alien, and now he wants to play the judge! We’ll treat you worse than them.”
Even his daughters’ husbands, who refuse to join his escape plans, regard him as a fool.  Lot, who so desperately wants to fit in, only now realizes that he is still an outsider. Yet despite this, he hesitates to leave: He has invested too much in becoming a Sodomite.
This tension, signaled by the shalsheles, asks the ultimate existential question, “Who am I?” Having tried so hard to become one-of-them, he finds it almost impossible to tear himself away. (In the 1930s, many Jews refused to leave Germany and Austria. They were modern day Lots).
Two more cases: (1) Eliezer, sent to find a wife for Isaac, proposes a test; the woman who offers to draw water for him and his camels will be the one chosen by G-d for his master’s son. Over the word “he said,” introducing his request of G-d that his test should succeed, is a shalsheles indicating a vacillation on Eliezer’s part.
Until then, he had been “weighing whether his own daughter was suitable.” Abraham himself had telegraphed this ‘possibility’ when he said, “L-rd, what can you give me since I remain childless and the one who will inherit my estate is Eliezer of Damascus.”
That Eliezer had such hopes can also be seen from his words: “What if [ulai] the woman is unwilling to come?” As Ibn Ezra notes, the word ulai signifies Eliezer’s subconscious expression that he wanted the mission to fail, placing his daughter in a position to be Abraham’s heir. It was therefore with profoundly mixed feelings that Eliezer “Said, ‘Let my mission succeed.’”
(2) Joseph (as a slave in Egypt) is propositioned by his master’s wife, “Come to bed with me.” The text continue, “He refused,” over which is another shalsheles. Imagine Joseph’s turmoil. On the one hand, his moral sense said No. It would be a betrayal of everything his family stood for. And yet, the temptation must have been intense. He was far from home in the ‘big city’.  No one could see him and after all the hostility he had suffered, being propositioned must have been flattering. It was a decisive moment. Would he remain faithful to his conscience, or make out like an ‘Egyptian’? The shalsheles is a subtle note of Joseph’s crise de conscience.
A shalsheles then is no mere detail of the ancient text. In Lot’s case, it is a sour note that has been replayed many times in history. During the nineteenth century, many European Jews entering mainstream society for the first time tried to assimilate.  It did not work. The more they strove to be like everyone else, the more conspicuous they were, and the stronger anti-semitism grew. They lost not only their parents’ heritage, but their self pride.
Lot and Abraham exemplify the contrast between ambivalence and the security that comes from a strong identity. Lot, who tried to become someone else, found himself regarded as an alien, an interloper, and a joker. Abraham forged his own path. True, he fought and prayed on behalf of his neighbors. But he lived true to his faith, his mission, and his covenant with G-d. Yet his fellow citizens called him, “A prince of G-d in our midst.”
This equation has not changed. Non-Jews respect Jews who respect Judaism; they are embarrassed by Jews who are embarrassed by Judaism. So never waver and don’t get stuck under a shalsheles of your own making.