Timeless Torah

Four sons related to each other by their Father in heaven: one of them is wise, the other is wicked, the next is simple and the fourth, alas, is one who does not even know how to ask.

Which son are you? Which one would you like your own child to be? I have a sneaking suspicion that even the wicked sibling would not relish the thought of being the one who could not even formulate a question. But is this son really so bad? In Chassidic lore, the Rebbe Rashab once highly praised the last child, explaining that this refers to a person who, despite the many challenges that life presents, does not question his Creator.

Or as another Chassidic master put it, “The one who does not know what to ask, his prayer is the best.” Now what do you think he could possibly have meant?

At a weekend dedicated to the search for spirituality, a woman who had little exposure to Judaism spoke up. “This morning I was more frustrated than I have ever been. I passed by the room where everyone was having services and I wanted to join. But my family was never religious, we hardly went to Temple and I don’t know the first thing about prayer. I stood outside, wanting to go in, but not knowing what I would do if I were inside.”

The Rabbi replied, “You were frustrated because you saw us praying, but you did not know how to pray yourself. Maybe that is how it appeared from your perspective. But let us look at it from G-d’s angle.

“When G-d saw us entering the synagogue, He may very well have said, ‘Oy vay, look who’s coming. More people with their selfish requests: ‘G-d give me this’ or ‘G-d give me that.’ All they can think about is their own needs.

“Then G-d saw you standing outside, broken hearted, desperately wanting to pray but not knowing how. G-d then said, ‘Look at this precious child of mine. She is in such agony because she wants to reach Me, but she does not know how.’

“Tell me,” said the Rabbi, “whose prayer was more sincere: Ours asking that G-d fulfill all of our desires, or your silent prayer wishing to be able to come closer to G-d?”

So which son are you?